Top 10 Songs By Letter, A-Z

A
10. ADIDAS, KoRn
9. Agony in Her Body, Sage Francis
8. Anyway You Want It, Journey
7. All Along the Watchtower, The Jimi Hendrix Experience
6. Add It Up, The Violent Femmes
5. Ana Ng, They Might Be Giants
4. Album of the Year, The Good Life
3. Art is Hard, Cursive
2. Across the Sea, Weezer
1. Ace of Spades, Motorhead

B
10. Barbie Girl, Aqua
9. Billie Jean, Michael Jackson
8. Black Hole Sun, Soundgarden
7. Baby, I Like It Raw, Ol’ Dirty Bastard
6. Be My Yoko Ono, Barenaked Ladies
5. Basketcase, Green Day
4. Baby It’s Cold Outside, Tom Jones
3. Ballroom Blitz, Sweet
2. Baby Got Back, Sir Mix-A-Lot
1. Bohemian Rhapsody, Queen

C
10. C-C-C-C Cinnamon Lips, Ok Go
9. Caress Me Down, Sublime
8. Closer, Nine Inch Nails
7. Come On Eileen, Dexy’s Midnight Runners
6. Closing Time, Semisonic
5. Cop Killer, Body Count
4. Cum on Feel the Noize, Quiet Riot
3. The Calendar Hung Itself, Bright Eyes
2. Centerfold, J. Geil’s Band
1. Come Together, The Beatles

D
10. Days Go By, Dirty Vegas
9. Dead Man’s Party, Oingo Boingo
8. Dry the Rain, The Beta Band
7. Dammit, Blink 182
6. Don’t Come Around Here No More, Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers
5. Dr. Feelgood, Motley Crue
4. The Distance, Cake
3. Drain You, Nirvana
2. Debaser, Pixies
1. Dirt Off Your Shoulder, Jay-Z

E
10. Enter Sandman, Metallica
9. The End, The Doors
8. Epic, Faith No More
7. Everybody Wants to Rule the World, Tears for Fears
6. Eternal Flame, Atomic Kitten
5. Evolve, Ani DiFranco
4. Eye of the Tiger, Survivor
3. El Scorcho, Weezer
2. Even Flow, Pearl Jam
1. Eleanor Rigby, The Beatles

F
10. Fake Palindromes, Andrew Bird
9. Fight For Your Right, Beastie Boys
8. Fat Bottomed Girls, Queen
7. Flagpole Sitta, Harvey Danger
6. Freshman, The Verve Pipe
5. Fuck Tha Police, N.W.A.
4. Free Fallin’, Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers
3. Fast Car, Tracy Chapman
2. Folsom Prison Blues, Johnny Cash
1. Faith, George Michael

G
10. Gin and Juice, Snoop Dogg
9. Goodnight Goodnight, Hot Hot Heat
8. God Save the Queen, The Sex Pistols
7. God Called In Sick Today, AFI
6. Good Riddance (Time of Your Life), Green Day
5. Gold Digger, Kanye West
4. Glycerine, Bush
3. Good Vibrations, The Beach Boys
2. Guerilla Radio, Rage Against the Machine
1. Gangsta’s Paradise, Coolio

H
10. Here I Go Again, Whitesnake
9. Hallelujah, Jeff Buckley
8. Hello, Lionel Richie
7. Hey Jude, The Beatles
6. How Soon is Now?, The Smiths
5. Helter Skelter, The Beatles
4. Hurt, Johnny Cash
3. Heroes, David Bowie
2. Hey Jealousy, Gin Blossoms
1. Happiness is a Warm Gun, The Beatles

I
10. I Believe in a Thing Called Love, The Darkness
9. (I Can’t Get No) Satisfaction, The Rolling Stones
8. I Ran, A Flock of Seagulls
7. I Love Rock ‘N Roll, Joan Jett
6. I’m Too Sexy, Right Said Fred
5. I Melt With You, Modern English
4. I Am the Walrus, The Beatles
3. Ignition (Remix), R. Kelly
2. I Touch Myself, The Divynls
1. I’m Gonna Be (500 Miles), The Proclaimers

J
10. Jump, Kriss Kross
9. Jump Around, House of Pain
8. Just A Girl, No Doubt
7. Just What I Needed, The Cars
6. Judy is a Punk, The Romones
5. Jane Fonda, Mickey Avalon
4. Jeremy, Pearl Jam
3. Jerry Was a Racecar Driver, Primus
2. Jane Says, Jane’s Addiction
1. Jolene, Dolly Parton

K
10. Kennedy, Kill Hannah
9. Kick Out the Jams, The Presidents of the United States of America
8. Knowledge, Operation Ivy
7. Korobeiniki (The Tetris Song), Ozma
6. Kiss Me, Sixpence None the Richer
5. Kiss Me, Son of God, They Might Be Giants
4. Killing Me Softly, The Fugees
3. Kiss Off, The Violent Femmes
2. Karma Police, Radiohead
1. Killer Queen, Queen

L
10. Las Cruces Jail, Two Gallants
9. Light My Fire, The Doors
8. Land Down Under, Men at Work
7. Last Nite, The Strokes
6. Last Caress, The Misfits
5. Lover I Don’t Have to Love, Bright Eyes
4. Last Train to Clarksville, The Monkees
3. Layla, Eric Clapton
2. Lola, The Kinks
1. Let it Be, The Beatles

M
10. Message in a Bottle, Neva Dinova
9. Makeshift Patriot, Sage Francis
8. Man of Constant Sorrow, Norman Blake
7. Metro, Berlin
6. Mambo No. 5, Lou Bega
5. My Sharona, The Knack
4. Mr. Jones, Counting Crows
3. Maggie’s Farm, Bob Dylan
2. Master of Puppets, Metallica
1. My Generation, The Who

N
10. NiggyTardust, Saul Willaims
9. Nobody’s Darlings, Lucero
8. Notes in His Pockets, The Good Life
7. Nothing But a G Thang, Dr. Dre
6. No Action, Elvis Costello
5. Night of the Living Dead, Tilly and the Wall
4. No Regrets, Aesop Rock
3. New York, New York, Frank Sinatra
2. Nothing Compares 2 U, Sinead O’Connor
1. November Rain, Guns N Roses

O
10. Ocean Breathes Salty, Modest Mouse
9. Oh No, Gogol Bordello
8. Only in Dreams, Weezer
7. Orange Crush, R.E.M.
6. Orgasm Addict, The Buzzcocks
5. Obnoxious, Immortal Technique
4. Only Happy When It Rains, Garbage
3. The Old Apartment, Barenaked Ladies
2. Off the Record, My Morning Jacket
1. On the Road Again, Willie Nelson

P
10. Putting on the Ritz, Taco
9. Problems and Bigger Ones, Harvey Danger
8. Planet, Schmanet, Janet, Tsunami Bomb
7. Purple Haze, Jimi Hendrix
6. Pink Triangle, Weezer
5. Polly, Nirvana
4. Push, Matchbox 20
3. Piano Man, Billy Joel
2. The Passenger, Iggy Pop
1. Paint it Black, The Rolling Stones

Q
10. The Quitter, NOFX
9. Quiet as a Mouse, Margot and the Nuclear So and So’s
8. Que Suerte!, Cap’n Jazz
7. Question the Answer, Strike Anywhere
6. Quiet Houses, Fleet Foxes
5. Quit Yer Job, Chixdiggit
4. Question Mark, Eliott Smith
3. Quart in Session, NOFX
2. Queen of Pain, Alkaline Trio
1. Questions, Tommy Emannuel

R
10. Rapper’s Delight, Sugarhill Gang
9. Right Now, SR-71
8. Ruby Soho, Rancid
7. Roll On, The Living End
6. Roll to Me, Del Amitri
5. Red Red Wine, UB40
4. Rocket Man, Elton John
3. Rock the Casbah, The Clash
2. Rock Me Amadeus, Falco
1. Rock You Like a Hurricane, Scorpions

S
10. Safety Dance, Men Without Hats
9. Save Tonight, Eagle Eye Cherry
8. Seven Nation Army, The White Stripes
7. Sunday, Bloody Sunday, U2
6. Slow Motion, Third Eye Blind
5. Sabotage, The Beastie Boys
4. Summer of ’69, Bryan Adams
3. Stronger, Kanye West
2. Sunshine, Lollipops and Rainbows, Lesley Gore
1. Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band, The Beatles

T
10. Tainted Love, Soft Cell
9. Take on Me, A-Ha
8. Torn, Natalie Umbruglia
7. Teenage F.B.I., Guided By Voices
6. That Thing You Do!, New Found Glory
5. Tom’s Diner, Suzanne Vega
4. Teenagers, My Chemical Romance
3. Turning Japanese, The Vapors
2. Toxic, Britney Spears
1. Take the Skinheads Bowling, Camper Van Beethoven

U
10. Unity, Operation Ivy
9. The Ups and Downs, Ozma
8. Untitled, Blink 182
7. Until the End, The Nightwatchman (Tom Morello)
6. Unforgiven, Metallica
5. Undone (The Sweater Song), Weezer
4. Uptown Girl, Billy Joel
3. Untouchable Face, Ani DiFranco
2. Under the Bridge, Red Hot Chili Peppers
1. Under Pressure, David Bowie and Queen

V
10. Voyeur, Blink 182
9. Violent, The Faint
8. Verb: That’s What’s Happening, Moby
7. Vanilla Sex, NOFX
6. Vietnow, Rage Against the Machine
5. Vacation, The Go-Gos
4. Viva Las Vegas, Elvis Presley
3. Violent Love, Oingo Boingo
2. Vincent, Don McClean
1. Video Killed the Radio Star, The Bugles

W
10. Why Don’t You Get a Job?, The Offspring
9. Working for the Weekend, Loverboy
8. Why?, Andrew Bird
7. White Wedding, Billy Idol
6. What It’s Like, Everlast
5. White America, Eminem
4. Wrong Way, Sublime
3. Welcome to the Jungle, Guns N Roses
2. Where Is My Mind?, Pixies
1. While My Guitar Gently Weeps, The Beatles

X
10. XO, Fall Out Boy
9. XR2, M.I.A.
8. XXX XOXOX, Norman Bailer
7. Xual Zan’s Heart, Non-Prophets
6. X-99, Limp
5. Xavia, The Submarines
4. Xokolat Orange, Indiephone
3. Xxplosive, Dr. Dre
2. Xanax, Maria Taylor
1. XXX, McCarthy Trenching

Y
10. Your Birthday Present, The Good Life
9. Yesterday, The Beatles
8. You Shook Me All Night Long, AC/DC
7. You Give Love a Bad Name, Bon Jovi
6. You Ain’t Seen Nothin’ Yet, Bachman-Turner Overdrive
5. Yeah, Usher
4. You Oughta Know, Alanis Morissette
3. You Can’t Always Get What Ya Want, The Rolling Stones
2. You Can Call Me Al, Paul Simon
1. You Spin Me Round, Dead or Alive

Z
10. Zombie Aesthetics, Vverevvolf Grehv
9. Zyclone B Bathhouse, NOFX
8. Zero-Sum, Nine Inch Nails
7. Zapata’s Blood (Live), Rage Against the Machine
6. Zapatista, Don’t Give Up, Anti-Flag
5. Zombies Walk (Kanye West Cover), Sufjan Stevens
4. Ziplock, Lit
3. Zoot Suit Riot, Cherry Poppin’ Daddies
2. Zombie, The Cranberries
1. Ziggy Stardust, David Bowie

Top 16 Bands You Don't Know That You Should

16. Regina Spektor

Check Out: Her radio friendly infectious single “Fidelity”

For Fans Of: Piano pop and bands like Ben Folds

15. M. Ward

Check Out: His folk-laden LP Post-War

For Fans Of: Bright Eyes; She & Him; My Morning Jacket

14. We Are the Physics

Check Out: Their abrasive album We Are the Physics are OK at Music

For Fans Of: The Blood Brothers; The Matches; The Faint

13. Simon Joyner

Check Out: His “best of” album Beautiful Losers

For Fans Of: Tranquil folk music; Bob Dylan, Calexico, Iron and Wine, Bright Eyes

12. Dogs Die in Hot Cars

Check Out: The unexpectedly addictive “Lounger,” on their full length Please Describe Yourself

For Fans Of: pop-rock with catchy melodies and solid lyrics

11. The Wombats

Check Out: Their debut full length A Guide to Love, Loss, and Desperation

For Fans Of: CSS; Dogs Die in Hot Cars; dancey pop-rock

10. Ozma

Check Out: The seminal, pivotal History of Rock and Roll, Part 3

For Fans Of: Weezer; nerd rock

9. Rediscover

Check Out: “Baby Got Her Gun Out” from their EP Call Me When You Get This

For Fans Of: trendy, super danceable synth rock

8. Kiss Kiss

Check Out: Their debut album Reality vs. The Optomist

For Fans Of: Cursive; Murder by Death; cross-genre art rock with violins

7. Tokyo Police Club

Check Out: Their debut mini-LP, the seven song A Lesson in Crime

For Fans Of: Canadian indie rock; Los Campesinos!; Saddle Creek Records

6. Tally Hall

Check Out: The bonus track version of Marvin’s Marvelous Mechanical Museum

For Fans Of: They Might Be Giants, catchy rock

5. Cold War Kids

Check Out: The infectious jam “Saint John” on their debut Robbers and Cowards

For Fans Of: rhythmic piano; unique drum beats; get stuck in your head melodies

4. Fourth of July

Check Out: On The Plains, available on Range Life Records

For Fans Of: Bright Eyes, The Violent Femmes

3. Capgun Coup

Check Out: Brought to You by Nebraskafish, availble for free at http://library.team-love.com

For Fans Of: The Violent Femmes, Bright Eyes, folk-punk

2. Los Campesinos!

Check Out: Their newest record, We Are Beautiful, We Are Doomed

For Fans Of: uber-danceable punk rock; Welsh accents; subtle violins; brilliant lyrics;

1. Tilly and the Wall

Check Out: Their debut on Team Love Records, Wild Like Children

For Fans Of: Saddle Creek Records; clapping; good times; tap dancing; hula parties

Top 15 Albums of the 1990s

15. Mellon Collie and the Infinite Sadness, Smashing Pumpkins

14. Follow the Leader, KoRn

13. Recovering the Satellites, Counting Crows

12. Mellow Gold, Beck

11. Jagged Little Pill, Alanis Morissette

10. Ten, Pearl Jam

9. (What's The Story) Morning Glory, Oasis

8. Yourself or Someone Like You, Matchbox 20

7. Blood Sugar Sex Magik, Red Hot Chili Peppers

6. Sublime, Sublime

5. Tragic Kingdom, No Doubt

4. Dookie, Green Day

3. Flood, They Might Be Giants

2. Pinkerton, Weezer

1. Nevermind, Nirvana

Top 10 Bands That Proved Punk Is Dead

Yes, I listen to a lot of "pop punk". But let's be real. Some of them are really good. Others, not really. These? FUCKING AWFUL. And to be totally honest, my heart cries when I hear a lot of these. I don't have the time to expand on it now, but I will, because some of these are not total crapshoots and deserve some explanations.

Enjoy.

10. Good Charlotte
9. Yellowcard
8. Panic! at the Disco
7. The Donnas
6. Bowling for Soup
5. Hawthorne Heights
4. Simple Plan
3. Fall Out Boy
2. Paramore
1. Avril Lavigne

Top 10 Hip Hop Songs After 2000 That Proved Rap Is Dead

Big ups to Allen Cox, he challenged me to this list. And I delivered. Suck on that, friends!

10. Back Then, Mike Jones
2005 really was a more innocent time. A time when some meathead dumbass could release an album with his name in the title (Who is Mike Jones?) and slap together a couple of verses and attach it to an overly self-indulgent chorus, and we, as American rap consumers,

9. My Humps, Black Eyed Peas
Sweet lordy, I hate the Black Eyed Peas. One of my biggest musical pet peaves is groups that survived based on having a hot woman in them. (I’m looking at you, No Doubt post Tragic Kingdom). Fergie is that essential piece to the Black Eyed Peas that took them from generic suck rap group to famous suck rap group. Oh yeah, this song sounds like it was a rough draft by one of my 7th grade students. For example:

What you gon' do with all that junk? All that junk inside that trunk? I'ma get, get, get, get, you drunk, Get you love drunk off my hump. What you gon' do with all that ass? All that ass inside them jeans? I'm a make, make, make, make you scream Make you scream, make you scream.

I mean, come on. And that was on the radio for damn near forever!

8. Right Thurr, Chingy
This set us all down a slippery slope, and hits all of the checklist. Butchering of syllables? Check. Simple rhymes based on genetalia and the stackedness of women? Check. Random changes of subject matter due to lack of rhyming words or words that can’t be altered? Check. Evan dying inside every time he hears it? Check-fucking-plus.

7. Crank That, Soulja Boy Tell Em
This is another song that appeals to the new trend of a small, minimal beat stuck on repeat. There really isn’t any difference between the verses and the choruses, and it’s hard to tell where one starts and the other ends or begins or who the Hell even knows. A lot of this song’s popularity is related to the fact that it has an equally retarded dance going along with it. Sort of like The Hustle, except even more annoying somewhere. I doubt the next generation will be cranking that soulja boy at roller rinks, though.

6. Lollipop, Lil Wayne
Oh, how I hate Lil Wayne. Actually, that’s not totally true. He’s great on Around the Horn and in ESPN The Magazine. And his tattoos on his face crack me up. I mean, how gangster does he think he is? Well, he’s gonna sing this one, with loads of vocoder (see T. Pain for more detail). Some of it reads like he’s trying to see how much he can get away with and still sell a gagillion records.

5. Laffy Taffy, D4L
This was the song that proved to me that you can take any word in the English language, slur it, put it over a fake 8-bit beat, and vaguely that it means the rear end of women, and BAM! summer time hit that every idiot in America will repeat endlessly.

4. London Bridges, Fergie
Fergie’s second appearance on this list. I’m not sure who told her she can rap. Probably dudes that wanted to plow her. She can’t rap. But with the Black Eyed Peas, when she was on stage with a dude who looked like a horse, you let it slide, cause she’s good looking (Remember, she has humps). However, throw her up on a track alone, and the verbal diarrhea combined with awful rhymes and a bland beat she jacked from Gwen Stefani’s house, and here we are.

3. American Life, Madonna
Madonna. Rapping. And yes, she was serious. Enough said.

2. Buy You A Drank, T. Pain
When we’re being totally honest, this is not the worst song on this list. Nor is it the second worst. BUT you must take into account the influence some songs have over the genre, and T. Pain has introduced hip hop to the vocoder, which mainstream media has dubbed “auto-tune”. Now, that’s incorrect because an auto-tune changes your pitch to match another pitch (tuning it), but the vocoder makes your voice shifty and wavy. It’s the same effect that makes Frampton’s guitar “talk”. That’s right folks. T. Pain has more in common with Framton Comes Alive that you’ll ever know. And know he’s introduced a whole slew of shitty faux-rappers to this technology so they can throw down on slow down R&B tracks to baby mamas and general whores that they encounter. Thanks, T. Pain.

1. Big Pimpin’, Jay-Z
When I heard this song, it hit me. Jay-Z, for all intents and purposes, was dead. The HOVA, the man who wore his cap real low and wouldn’t let you search his trunk, the man who had all that dirt on his shoulder, he was no more. He was churning out shitty summer rap hits. I swear, to this day, I hear this song, and the pseudo-white suburban teenager in me dies a little more.

Top 10 Live Albums

Live music, as I've said before, is the best music. Often, when it's recorded, it's terrible. It's hard to really capture a live event that can be so visual onto an audio medium. Sometimes, it comes out amazing. These following albums are all must haves.

10. Hair: Debatable, Atom and His Package
Top Tracks: Shopping Spree, Punk Rock Academy

9. Our Live Album is Better Than Your Live Album, Reel Big Fish
Top Tracks: S.R. (The Many Versions Of), Kiss Me Deadly

8. Rock Spectacle, Barenaked Ladies
Top Tracks: Brian Wilson, The Old Apartment

7. Viva Wisconsin Violent Femmes
Top Tracks: Add It Up, Kiss Off

6. Frampton Comes Alive, Peter Frampton
Top Tracks: Jumpin Jack Flash, Do You Feel Like We Do

5. Live at San Quentin, Charles Manson
Top Tracks: So The Mood Was Broken, Television Mind

4. The Last Waltz , The Band
Top Tracks: The Night They Drove Old Dixie Down, I Shall Be Released

3. Live at Leeds , The Who
Top Tracks: My Generation, Tattoo

2. Mtv Presents: Nirvana Unplugged, Nirvana
Top Tracks: All Apologies, Something in the Way

1. Live at Folsom Prison, Johnny Cash
Top Tracks: Folsom Prison Blues, Cocaine Blues

Honorable Mentions: Unplugged, Jay-Z; Bullet in a Bible, Green Day;

Top 10 Hip Hop Artists That Are Saving the Genre

This list serves as a foil to the list about hip hop artists who are killing the genre. Please download these artists, but their albums, go to their shows, wear their shirts, etc. Google their names for Myspaces, etc.

10. MC Homeless
He might just be on here because I was good friends with him and played in an amazing grindcore band with him. Or maybe it’s because he can rock spoken word, has a quick delivery, and despite being a lo-fi, friendly, and approachable guy, has some really good beats behind his tracks, and actually writes some pretty good lyrics. He’s out in L.A. now, and I hope he takes the entire city in his fist. They’ll all fall for him when they hear Champagne Wishes, which fantastically samples The Smith’s How Soon is Now?.

9. MC Lars
He calls himself post-punk laptop rap. There’s a lot to admire about MC Lars. He’s a Stanford grad. He still lives with his parents in the Bay Area. He uses a lot of pop-punk in his beats. Each album features a song about a famous literary work (So farThe Raven, Moby Dick, and Hamlet have been done). He also has a great sense for sampling, and can really turn a pop or rock song into a great hip hop beat. He also tours almost exclusively with punk bands, bringing new kids to the genre. He certainly wouldn’t make a “Top 10 Rappers” list, but he’s certainly saving the genre, by giving hip hop new victims.

8. MC Chris
MC Chris is really in the same boat as MC Lars. Though he’s a much better rapper than MC Lars, technically speaking, anyway, he wouldn’t make a Top 10 Rappers list by a long shot. He does, however, have massive exposure to kids who probably don’t listen to hip hop via appearances on Aqua Teen Hunger Force. He’s really like the Jesus of Nerd Core rap, which is a section of rap that really has an exclusive set of fans, meaning many Nerd Core fans don’t listen to main stream, and many main stream fans wouldn’t ever listen to Nerd Core.

7. Immortal Technique
He’s too dirty to be mainstream, but good Lord, can Immortal Technique rap, and write. As a man who grew up in Harlem, he has a chip on his shoulder towards the White, Republican majority that has power in the USA. His raps are equal parts “gangsta” profanity and Harvard level political discourse. One song includes both of the lines “Bust off on her face, and right after this segment, she’ll probably rub it in her pussy to try to get herself pregnant” and “Shallow mercenary, I don’t care how I get richer, like American companies that did business with Hitler”. It’s the juxtaposition that makes him so fantastic.

6. Aesop Rock
Aesop Rock has one of the best hip hop albums of all time, regardless of qualifications for the list. Labor Days was so fantastic that I never thought I’d listen to another CD again after I heard it for the first time. Unfortunately, he couldn’t keep up the pace and has released some duds. To be honest, his sports equivalent would be Manny Ramirez. Sure, he’s way past his prime now, but a few years ago he was theonly game in town, and redefined the game. Aesop Rock may have fallen off by now, but Labor Days lives on.

5. Sage Francis
Sage really doesn’t have one really solid album, but has a fantastic album’s worth of songs spread out over a couple of discs. A Healthy Distrust does have maybe 8 really good songs on it, though. The reason he’s this high is because he really is the forefront of both DIY hip hop and political focus. He was also the first rapper signed to Epitaph Records, a legendary punk record label. I’d credit a lot of this merger between scene/punk and hip hop is because a lot of kids saw this guy they’d never heard of on Epitaph, and decided to pick up his album, and proceeded to love it. He also played Warped Tour, a legendary punk tour, furthering his merger with punk rock, despite not really having any punk traces in his music.

4. Atmosphere / Slug
Atmosphere is a group. Slug is Atmosphere’s MC. Ant is the producer. Don’t point at Sean and say “Hey, there’s Atmosphere!”. I’ll hit you. And he’s like 7 feet tall. He’ll hit you, too. But Slug and Ant, known as Atmosphere, really invented “emo rap”, which a lot of people really hate. Unlike Aesop Rock, Atmosphere never really had a grand slam album, but their importance is really related to longevity. Atmosphere has maybe a dozen songs that are totally off the chart amazing, but that’s spread out over dozens of albums. God Loves Ugly is usually cited as their best, and I’d have to agree.

3. Kanye West
Come on, let me hear it. You fucking hate Kanye? Heartless is a terrible song? First off, no, it’s not, you just have a close minded taste in music. Second, Kanye is by far the most important and controversial name in hip hop right now, and rather than churn out generic shit rap hits (I’m looking at you, Lil Wayne), he has continued to try different things, progress, and evolve. I love all of Kanye’s music, and love that he mixes up genres, collaborates, and keeps everything fresh. Add in the influence he’s had over style the past few years, and you can’t argue with his impact at all. Go ahead, tell me that you don’t like his music. I don’t care. You’re just unrefined.

2. Mickey Avalon
It’s tough to talk about Mickey Avalon. He’s probably the new generation of “gangsta” rap. Except, while he’s rapping about fucking your bitch, he’s telling true tales about being a gay prostitute. He’s very, very witty, and has a unique, slowed delivery that really sets him apart from others in the genre. Please download his self-titled album and enjoy it, like I have.

1. Ceschi Ramos
I’ve also played on the same stage as him, but that has nothing to do with it. Ceschi might be the most amazing musician on the planet. I could name ten of his bands, each with a different genre, and each album amazing. His albums are completely cross genre, with some songs touching on jazz, metal, alternative rock, reggae, and even folk (including a song, Optical Illusion, that is completely a folk tune, including mandolin and egg shaker). His album They Hate Francisco False really should be the album of the year for ever year until he releases a new full length. I guarantee you’d love it if you’d listen to it. He packs speed (he can rap faster than you can hear), unbelievable lyrics (better than at least half of the Poet Laureates, no hyperbole, I swear), and musical diversity (pick a genre, he raps / sings / and plays it). Oh, he also has a huge group of incredibly talented friends that like to help out.

Top 10 Bands That Should Have Quit While Ahead

First, a few notes.

Thanks again for all the positive (and lack of) negative comments on the lists in general. I appreciate the support as I annoy you and waste your time. Now, on to the list.

Thanks to Melissa for this idea, it really hit the spot. As an explanation, this list ranks the bands and musicians that were at one point very, very good, and ended up very, very bad. Had they stopped somewhere along the way, their legacy would be preserved. As a reminder to how this works, number 10 would be the band that fell from grace the least, and number 1 fell the most.

10. The Who
Should Have Stopped After: Quadrophenia (1973)

9. Everyone in Blink-182
Should Have Stopped After: Blink-182 (2003), before any of them released any material as +44 or Angels and Airwaves

8. Radiohead
Should Have Stopped After: Ever deciding to form a band and torture my generation with the abominations they claim to be “innovative music”.

7. Bob Dylan
Should Have Stopped After: Slow Train Coming (1979)

6. Guns N Roses
Should Have Stopped After: Appetite for Destruction (1987)

5. Prince
Should Have Stopped After: Purple Rain (1984)

4. U2
Should Have Stopped After: Auchtung Baby (1991)

3. Gwen Stefani
Should Have Stopped After: Probably Tragic Kingdom (1995), but definitely Rock Steady (2001)

2. Eminem
Should Have Stopped After: The Marshall Mathers LP (2000)

1. Michael Jackson
Should Have Stopped After: Thriller (1982)

Top 10 Music Videos of All Time

Yes. Mtv. Music Television. Yes, throw in cliche jokes about how Mtv doesn't play videos anymore. I don't care. Music videos used to really be relevant. I remember when I was younger and my first exposure to songs was generally through music videos, because at that point I wasn't really listening to the radio. Anyway, below are my top ten choices for best music videos of all time, and for the first time ever, an honorable mentions section.

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10. Here I Go Again, Whitesnake

9. Smack My Bitch Up, Prodigy

8. Freak on a Leash, KoRn

7. Sabotage, Beastie Boys

6. Don’t Come Around Here No More, Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers

5. Here It Goes Again, OK Go

4. Sledehammer, Peter Gabriel

3. Buddy Holly, Weezer

2. Weapon of Choice, Fatboy Slim

1. Thriller, Michael Jackson

Honorable Mentions: Take on Me, A-Ha; Hurt, Johnny Cash

Top 10 Albums of the 1980s

10. It Takes a Nation of Millions to Hold Us Back, Public Enemy

9. Closer, Joy Division

8. Back in Black, AC/DC

7. Run D.M.C., Run D.M.C.

6. 1984, Van Halen

5. Graceland, Paul Simon

4. Surfer Rosa, The Pixies

3. Born in the U.S.A., Bruce Springsteen

2. Violent Femmes, Violent Femmes

1. Thriller, Michael Jackson

Top 10 Metal Songs of the 1980s (That We're Afraid to Admit We Like)

Oh, the 1980s. Its kitsch and overly campy nature made it one of the best decades in both music and movies. Top 10 Movies of the 1980s is definitely a list waiting to happen. But the music of the 1980s. It might not ever be topped. And one genre reigned supreme, from the Strip in LA to NYC: Metal. Be it Glam Metal, Hair Metal, whatever you want to call it, 80s Metal to this day cuts right to the chase with glittery guitar solos and mascara-laden vocals, deep loud snares and competent bass work. And what's amazing is that the bands and songs that were legends and anthems then are so embarrassing to us now, especially if you're not still dressing like Don Johnson from Miami Vice. I know I have all of these songs on my iPhone, but when I'm listening to them I hide the screen so people on the train can't see what it is that's making me bang my head.

As always, post your top 10, your comments, your hatred or love for my picks, and let me hear what you, the people, have to say about it.

10. Dude (Looks Like a Lady), Aerosmith

Supposedly this song was written about Vince Neil, lead singer of Motley Crue. As the story goes, Aerosmith met the boys in Crue and they were all saying the word "dude" repeatedly. This, combined with how fucking ridiculous Vince Neil looked, lead Steven Tyler and co. to pen a song filled with gentle mockery.

9. Rock You Like a Hurricane, Scorpions

Scorpions are actually a band from Germany, which few realize because of the singer's lack of an accent. Accent or not, this song kicks a ton of ass, and it requires being turned all the way up on the stereo so you can sing along in your car as you drive to a mundane job wishing you had done better in college. It's title, and lead lyric, is vaguely bawdy, but still powerful and catchy.

8. Love Stinks, J. Geil's Band

You could probably really argue with the "hair metal"-ness of this track, but I think it has all of the ingredients. Super-effected guitars? Check. Short, easy, repeatable chorus? Check. Psuedo-girly looking men being chased after by chicks from Jersey? Check. To be honest, Centerfold is probably a better song, but is definitely not even vaguely metal.

7. Dr. Feelgood, Motley Crue

The verses in this song are a little weak, and Vince Neil wasn't ever one of my favorite frontmen, but goddamn, this chorus will stick with you for a week if you're not careful. I hear there are still people in Bedlam Asylum singing the line "He's the one they call Dr. Feelgood, He's the one that makes you feel all right." Add in Tommy Lee on the drums and some overtly unnecessary guitar solos, and you have a stone cold classic.

6. Jump, Van Halen

People don't give this song, the album (1984) or Van Halen enough credit for how they altered rock 'n roll. Sure, they could have kept up their formula, but instead they added in that synthesizer. As the band would recount later, they had the music, but needed the lyrics to go with it. The bright, poppy overtones lended itself to a positive verb, and Jump was born. This album deserves to be up with Nevermind as far as changing music. That synth is that important, especially when you see a synth in almost every band that comes of age nowadays.

5. Pour Some Sugar On Me, Def Leppard

Nine-Arm jokes aside, who can argue with this track? And ironically, it's the strong, deep, forceful bass and snare combo that really sets this song apart. From the gibberish being mixed around at the beginning to that gut-crunching riff in the verse, Def Leppard somehow found a way to write a song so good that we'll forgive them how retarded they spell their name. And I don't care if you've lived under a rock for fifty years, you know the melody to the chorus, and you know that you want some sugar poured on you.

4. Cum on Feel the Noize, Quiet Riot

This song was just on my lift of best cover songs. It was originally written by a band named Slade. Quiet Riot took it, added some 1980s metal-fantasticness to it, and kicked Slade's ass out the door. The chorus is insanely catchy, and the simple verses make it very easy to learn the words, for full in-car sing along abilities. The strained vocals and background-chanting are what really pull me in.

3. Cherry Pie, Warrant

This one really makes it in here on a technicality. It wasn't released until 1990 but it was recorded and finished in 1989, which to me makes it count in the 1980s. I mean, it's just so 80s, how can you consider it anything different? I know that the video is what made it really famous, but I've seen naked women before, so I'm not too impressed with it. But the singular bell ride with that strong bass-snare backing up the crunching guitars hooks me every time. And when you add in that the song is so vulgar without actually swearing, it's just... it's just amazing.

2. Wanted (Dead or Alive), Bon Jovi

Metal men have a softer side. Some were rebels. Some lived out on the open road. It wasn't all loud distortion. They could bring the acoustic twang, too. And the intro to Bon Jovi's hit Wanted (Dead or Alive) always makes me want to drive down a dust covered dirt road in black and white. Add in the progression that grows throughout the whole song, and it turns into the slowdown jam at every party that you break out when you need a breather but don't want to stop singing. And if you love to air guitar, then this is the song you should practice to. You have the impressive acoustic arpeggios, but then the kick ass solos that bust in a few times.

1. We're Not Gonna Take It, Twisted Sister

Say what you want about Dee Snider. I love him. And always will. He had filed teeth. He dressed like a nightmarish drag queen doll that went through several wardrobe changes, except never took anything off. But you can't deny that he knew how to write an anthem. And what an anthem this is. It just leaks pure testosterone. It lends itself to chanting and fist pumping. Break this out at a party, and I don't care who's there or what they're doing, but when that chorus comes up everyone is jumping in place, fists banging in the air, screaming those five words over and over again.

And because every good metal head knows you always crank it up to 11...

BONUS! Don't Stop Believing, Journey

Okay, maybe not so metal. But it has all of the over the top aspects that any good metal song needs. Long, slow build up; fast, almost-out of place guitar solos; catchy chorus; and as a bonus, everyone on earth knows the first verse, and will stop what they're doing to belt it out. Yeah, she took the midnight train going anywhere. Yeah, some will win and some will lose. But it doesn't matter. We're never going to stop believing. And we will always hold on to that feeling.

Top 10 Cover Songs

Growing up and learning the guitar, I practiced new skills by playing the songs of bands that I idolized, which at this point is a list of bands I might not want to share publicly (Think punk rock). When I started playing in bands I always loved playing cover songs. It's a lot of fun. The following bands clearly think so, too.

As always, leave comments, flame wars, wild defamation, and unproven hyperbole below.


10. Sweet Dreams, Marilyn Manson (Original by Eurythmics)
9. Somebody to Love, Jefferson Airplane (Original by The Great Society)
8. Summer Lovin', The Vandals (Original by Grease Cast)
7. Big Poppa, Mindless Self Indulgence, (Original by Notorious B.I.G.)
6. I Will Survive, Cake (Original by Gloria Gaynor)
5. Jolene, The White Stripes (Original by Dolly Parton)
4. Tainted Love, Soft Cell (Gloria Jones)
3. Cum On Feel the Noize, Quiet Riot (Original by Slade)
2. Istanbul (Not Constantinople) , They Might Be Giants (Originial by Jimmy Arnold and Nat Simon)
1. Hurt, Johnny Cash (Original by Nine Inch Nails)

Top 10 Bands to See Live

So, live music has always been my thing. My first real concert was Weird Al when I was in sixth grade. Since then I've been hooked on the live experience and I think a lot of people who are in to less-mainstream are. Most bands I know exist for the live shows, not the studio albums. The only real stipulation to this list is that all of the bands are still playing shows (to my knowledge). This leaves off obvious candidates like Pink Floyd and The BeeGees.


10. Flogging Molly
To be totally honest, I'm not a big Flogging Molly fan. But you can't argue with the energy they bring, even if they're old. The Celtic-Punk fusion sound really just means you can definitely do some awesome body moving.

9. Mindless Self Indulgence
A lot of people really, really, really hate MSI. Which is a shame, because if you're into anything slightly offensive, watching Lil Jimmy Urine interact with the crowd is a great thing to see. It's hard to argue with a man who can alternate between a growl and ear-splitting falsetto while taking off his pants and flipping the bird.

8. Los Campesinos!
An actual UK band (unlike Flogging Molly, that just pretends), Los Camp! has seven members who would really like you to dance around while they play some danceable punk. I didn't stop smiling the entire concert, I don't even know why. On top of that they are a pretty great band, and are good looking with British accents. Need I say more?

7. Andrew Bird
It doesn't seem like Andrew Bird would be a great act to see live. His records are mostly down-tempo, and to be honest, can be rambling. But to watch him create his songs live in incredible. He's usually either alone or with a drummer. He will play pieces of his songs on one instrument, record it as a loop, and then play another instrument and so on, until he has built the entire song on his loop station. Then he'll play through the song, weaving in the loops of violin, guitar, whistling, xylophone, clapping, etc. A must see!

6. The Faint
The only Saddle Creek Records band on the list (which may be surprising to people who know that I cream over every act they've ever had). The Faint is certainly danceable, but lately has been building on noise music. What makes them a great band to see is that they incorporate synchronized light and video shows. Add this to the great music and it's definitely a great time to be had by all.

5. Reel Big Fish
RBF has three gigantic positives for their live shows: great, great songs, unexpected set lists including fantastic cover songs, and a very, very long set list. Anyone who's seen them can say that their banter between songs is pretty hilarious, and you really never know what you're going to get. It'll be a solid mix of old favorites, new classics, and bizarre, random, delicious cover tunes.

4. Gogol Bordello
Eugene Fucking Hutz. End of story. Youtube this guy. His energy is out of this world. And their klezmer sound is fueled by a fiddle player that is roughly 60. This trans-European act will blow you away, even if you don't know a word to any of their songs. And there are a lot of words you won't know, since Eugene will sing is several languages in the same song.

3. Bruce Springsteen (and the E Street Band)
I've seen The Boss three times, though once was just two songs when he opened for John Kerry during 2004 election season. Around that time I saw him another political tour (Bright Eyes opened), and he played for three fucking hours. Three hours. And he's old, man. But he's going to play every song you love, he's going to play it well, and you're going to love it, goddammit. I saw him on an acoustic tour as well, and he no longer had his Jersey swagger, he was tender, yet heartfelt and strong. But I've always loved his acoustic material, though a lot of people don't.

2. They Might Be Giants
The first time I saw them, they got the entire crowd to do a conga line. They have fun, they will make you have fun. Their songs are playful, but not silly, and they have a whole lot of good ones. They will pull out boxes and boxes of instruments, do some kid songs, and probably a surprise cover or two. They've been playing monthly shows in New York City lately, but I haven't had the time to see them and it's a shame. They also may play a song that they wrote specifically for your venue. At one point they did a 30 city tour, played a song about each venue at that show, recorded them, and released them on a record. Not many bands vary their set lists at all on a tour, let alone write an entire new song for each night.

1. Green Day
I know I'll get shit for this, but if you've seen them live, you understand. A giant wall of video screens, synchronized pyrotechnics, great tunes, and always a few awesome covers thrown in for good measure (such as Always Look on the Bright Side of Life and Shout, all woven into their deep cut "King for A Day" off of Nimrod). Though they have backing musicians now, they'll always do a few old songs off of Dookie as a trio, with Billie Joe using his original white stratocaster, the guitar he played up until they recorded Dookie. No matter what they charge, I'll go see them. The two times I've seen them were the most fun I've ever had in my life. Taking my sister the second time made it even better, because it was her first major concert.

Top 10 Beatles Songs

I think the Beatles are one of the most interesting bands in rock 'n roll history because they are so great that even I, a casual Beatles listener who wouldn't ever put them anywhere near a list of my favorite bands, can still easily rattle off my ten favorite songs. And despite this, they are still somehow overrated. Like I said, it's interesting.

Your list would almost certainly be different. I encourage discussion, debate, flaming, faggotry, and wild, unproven speculation.

And it begins....

10. I Want to Hold Your Hand
9. Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band
8. Yesterday
7. Eight Days a Week
6. Hey Jude
5. I Am the Walrus
4. Come Together
3. Happiness is a Warm Gun
2. Let it Be
1. Eleanor Rigby

Top 10 One Hit Wonders From the 90s

So, here are my choices for the ten best one hit wonders from the 1990s. I know we all have a love of lists, and regular random lists would be awesome. I def want to hear your opinions, and your lists. And I don't think you could dispute the one-hit-wonderness of any of these (I previously had Jane Says by Jane's Addiction on there but removed it because I don't feel like they really were a one hit wonder. Anyway, here it is:

10. Just A Friend, Biz Markie
9. Cotton-Eyed Joe, Rednex
8. Barbie Girl, Aqua
7. Closing Time , Semisonic
6. Love Fool, Cardigans
5. Roll to Me, Del Amitri
4. Breakfast at Tiffany's, Deep Blue Something
3. Semi-Charmed Life, Third Eye Blind
2. Sex and Candy, Marcy Playground
1. Hey Jealousy, Gin Blossoms